Tuesday, March 02, 2010


I was pulling in to the Kohls' parking lot today for a little prednisone induced weight gain shopping when I noticed that on the ground next to my parking space was what appeared to be a crumpled up bra. I got out and sure enough there was a lonely beat-up beige bra sitting alone in the parking lot and I started cracking up. You know exactly what happened don't you? Some poor woman was having a rushed morning, she's behind doing the laundry because her kids throw clothes in the hamper that aren't even dirty and she's down to the last bras in her drawer. She's running behind, throws one on, runs out the door and ALL MORNING LONG that fucker pinches here and slides there and she's pulling and tugging and her skin is getting irritated. She decides she's taking an early lunch, runs over to Kohl's, stomps in and grabs another of her favorite bra, not even caring that it's twice as much as she usually pays because of course it's not on sale today. She gets in the car, does that magic bra removal trick that only women know and throws that piece of shit bra out the window! I have done this with socks. The only place for the offending item is in the trash. I hope she's more comfortable now.

I'm glad I got that little giggle in in the parking lot because by the time I left Kohl's after my 37 minute pants buying spree I was sweating, my hair was static-y and all over the place, I was frustrated that women's pants all gape in the back (WTF?), and I was about as amused as the imaginary bra woman and considerably less satisfied with the result.


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